Monday, December 06, 2004

Bestriding the World like a Colossus is Boring

Any listener to sports talk will tell you that a losing team is much, much better radio than a winning one (and some winning teams, according to this article, apparently now enjoy the unfair advantage of exciting ray-gun technology). How boring does it get to talk about how great so-and-so is? "Hey, Mike, Dwayne Smith is just a fantastic receiver." Zzzz. So it's pretty clear now, just a month after the humiliating Democratic face-plant, and the emasculation of liberals nationwide, that there is a conundrum facing the Republican Party and far-right radio: What In The World Do We Talk About? Really? Rush Limbaugh, always on the cutting edge of societal evolution, shows us the way with food talk, latent homoeroticism and birding:
"Every description of Red Bull's flavor I'm getting is different: like the south of a northbound skunk, like Sweet Tarts, like strawberry soda. None of them has anything in common -- and I haven't had a Sweet Tart in so long. Aren't there many flavors of sweet tarts? Heck if I know."

"Brian Williams is so good-looking, he's been cast as an empty suit Ken doll right out of the anchor cookie cutter factory, but I found him to be far more intelligent and have far more depth than I think a newscast will ever allow anybody to present."

"If a bird could grab a shotgun and fire back at us, it would, folks. Never forget that."

Thank you, Rush. Thank you.

Permalink posted by Jonathan : 10:20 AM

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